Since I became ill all I seem to do is apologise for my absence, and my unreliability and waste time agonising over small things, and I feel guilty about almost everything. For some reason, I feel guilty for just living my life as best I can. I am fatigued and in pain every day. But… Continue reading Anxiety and apologies and guilt
This illness is so unpredictable. My usual mantra was "Carry on regardless". I physically can't do that anymore. My body won't allow it. Because of this I am always, cancelling, rescheduling even forgetting about plans that I have made with people. Some people understand this and others just or won't get it. I find it… Continue reading Being Unreliable
After I wrote my very first blog I felt liberated and I also felt lighter as if I'd finally offloaded and revealed my "act". I felt like I didn't have to hide things anymore. I even got a few positive comments about how brave I have been and how well-written it was. It made me… Continue reading Emptiness
Being chronically ill has made me grateful for everything I have. Being chronically ill makes you take stock of your life and who and what's in it. I realize that something shit has happened and it can't be changed. So I am grateful for the simple things in life and through that, I have realised… Continue reading Gratitude
How is this for irony? You suffer from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and you can't sleep! Whatever evil created this illness must have thought they were pretty smart. I struggle to wake up in the mornings, tired by lunchtime, dying from fatigue by 3 pm begging to go to bed at 5 pm stay up for… Continue reading Insomnia
Orkney Fibromyalgia Sufferer 