Low Spell

I’m stuck in this low spell, each day on repeat, dragging myself from one day to the next. Lost in the never-ending pattern of symptoms. My brain is literally screaming PAIN at me continually, day and night. I can’t concentrate or focus on anything. Anxiety has joined the party. Uninvited I might add. I am doing my best not to think about Friday. But I am finding it impossible to concentrate on anything else. Even if my appointment on Friday is successful I will still be left in the same place. I need adequate pain relief to be able to function “normally”. I have lived with this pain for 10 years and I haven’t received the treatment and never will receive the treatment I require.

It’s not only barbaric the way chronic pain patients are treated, but It’s also medical negligence. I am not a drug seeker. I am prepared to try any alternative methods that they can offer me. The problem with that is it’s a postcode lottery and if you live in Orkney you lose. I watched a video of a girl crying her heart out yesterday because she was in so much pain, she couldn’t even get a telephone appointment with a GP. Her local practice point-blank refused, and she ended up calling 111 and although visited by a Paramedic, they couldn’t help her either. She has been put in a position where she has no other choice but to go Private, just to be seen by a GP. I see people all over social media every day in the same position as me. I also see many people that are worse off than me too. More must be done to ensure we are afforded adequate treatment like any other patient. I wish I could make more of an impact to help my community. I am only one voice, shouting at a very big world and nobody that can help (medical professionals) is listening.