One thing I don’t want this blog to become is repetitive. I am struggling to come up with new material for my blog. I have plenty of time to think about what to write, but that is not how I have come up with my material. All my previous posts have been written when something has inspired me or my brain has jumped into gear and each entry has flowed very easily. The whole approach has been organic.
I feel like I have reached a point where from now on each entry will be repetitive. This illness and any chronic illness is repetitive. Most of my days are repetitive. Each day is like a repeat of the one before. It’s like Groundhog Day every day. My health is consistently poor. No good days or bad days. Each day is pretty much the same. I don’t want this blog to come over as “Woe is me” I tried to balance my posts with my post about happiness. I have received lots of positive feedback about my writing style which is great and appreciated. But now I am full of self-doubt as I have put myself “out there” and I have come to a fork in the road. I most certainly don’t want to stop writing as I really enjoy it and I find it extremely therapeutic and a valuable form of release.
I want each post to be fresh and interesting. But life with chronic illness isn’t particularly interesting. It is very mundane. Brain fog has been killing my creative flow. Brain fog is so hard to explain. It feels like I have a knot in the front of my brain which stops it from functioning as it should. I am really hoping that my next creative spark is just around the corner.